What is Religious Deconstruction?

Deconstruction has been somewhat of a buzz word in religious spaces for many years now, and along with a million definitions, there can be found a million different opinions about it; it's good and right, it's wrong and bad - and everything in between.

I prefer to term my own deconstruction journey as a renegotiation of my faith - it feels like a forward-moving, positive, growth term instead of a 'set fire and watch it burn' kind of thing. About 20-years ago (good lord, feeling old!) a group of friends and I working in a church setting started asking questions - about how systems were treating people, about who exactly gets to decide who's in or out (and what makes them in or out), and about why things that were said from the pulpit obviously didn't connect with our day-to-day lived experiences.

Essentially, this is the what deconstruction is - critically thinking about the things that have been handed to us on a religious platter. And asking these questions can be, pardon the phrase, scary as hell.

When I started questioning the things that I'd always just assumed to be truth, I felt many feelings, to name a few:

• Disloyal - to those who had taught me these principles. Most of the people I learned about faith from are people whom I love dearly - kind, generous, loving people.

• Scared - about a tonne of things, but mostly about losing my good standing in others' eyes (I'm an Enneagram 3 - IYKYK). Many people also fear the loss of community and belonging.

• Unmoored - it's really hard to navigate difficult seasons in life without the anchors of certitude that used to be so grounding.

• Lost - I'm still trying to figure out who I am without being at the centre of a church community. I'm okay - but all of the sonar pings that used to help me locate who I was and where I was at, have changed. This means having to figure out what connection points I look to now to remind me of who I am.

Contact Deb

You probably have different feelings or thoughts when it comes to deconstruction - because no two journeys are the same. Everyone has such different experiences when it comes to how they entered a religious space, what their experience was like, and what became the catalyst for starting to think critically about it all. For some of us it's been a slow burn, consisting of little red flags and 'hang on a minute...'s. For others, it's been more of an abrupt and swift shift.

But whatever your experience, it's my mission to make sure that you know that you're not alone. You're not crazy, you're not weird, you're not a disobedient rebel (well, not in a bad way, anyway). If you would like some support, please reach out. I see people in-person here in Bend, OR, or anywhere in the world virtually. Also, I periodically run therapeutic process groups around deconstruction and religious trauma, so flick me your email address if you're keen to be contacted about the next group.

Please remember that your critically thinking brain is a gift from God, and mostly importantly, you are not alone!